What to do about ‘shoulds’

What to do about ‘shoulds’

by | Critical Self-Talk, Negative Self-Talk, Self-Talk, Shoulds

The voices in our heads are always eager to offer up suggestions about what we ‘should’ do. Unfortunately, it’s not always easy to do what we know we ‘should’ do. And this is when the inner war sets in… the war between what we think we ‘should’ do and that part of us that feels unable to do what we know we ‘should’ do. This can drive us crazy! This experience is also energetically draining with its polarized push and pull.

So what is this really all about?

In my work with hundreds of people I have found that both sides always want what is best for us. No one part is ever really against us, even if on the surface it looks like self-sabotage. Underlying the self-sabotage is a deeper desire to ensure that we’re safe. And that part is doing everything within its power to achieve that objective.

So what can I do about this?

We can do a number of things to help to bring peace to these warring patterns…

  1. Recognize that both these warring patterns want the same thing… to be safe (or free, or happy, etc.)
  2. Attune to the Intelligence within the pattern (that animates this pattern) and recognize and acknowledge that this Innate Intelligence is a part of You, Your Spirit.
  3. Do your best to be kinder to yourself, to all parts of you, to all the voices. They just want to be seen, heard and acknowledged.
  4. Ask your Spirit to bring these parts of yourself back into harmony, back in Oneness.
  5. The “Future Meditation” is also an effective way to bring warring factions to a place of peace. You can use this meditation to breathe peace into the parts of you, to breathe peace into your future experience. You can access it here.

Wishing you much peace!

Boost Your Confidence

Boost Your Confidence

by | Articles, Boost your Confidence, Confidence, Critical Self-Talk, Negative Self-Talk, Self-Talk

Would you like to boost your confidence?

 

If you’re like most people, there’s probably an area in your life where you’d like to boost your confidence. And here’s the good news… increasing one’s confidence is much easier than you might imagine.

Most of us have tried all sorts of strategies to deal with the critical voices that erode our confidence. You know the ones that tell us that were not enough, that we’re unworthy or undeserving. And often times we don’t even hear a verbal message but are just flooded with the emotions of insecurity and fear.

One of the most effective ways to deal with these negative voices and emotions is to remind ourselves…

  1. this is simply a program that’s been activated,
  2. and this program is animated by MY Lifeforce, and
  3. and this Lifeforce is caught up in this program.

Doing this helps reduce the emotional charge and makes it easier to move into a more neutral position. Once you’re feeling a little more centered then…

  1. do your best to access the feeling of compassion,
  2. with each exhalation imagine breathing this compassion into that aspect of yourself that feels insecure,
  3. breathe compassion until you feel better about yourself

If your critical voices are really loud it can be quite difficult to access compassion to calm all this noise down. If you really want to be free quickly you may want to consider a private session.

In the meantime, be gentle with yourself, and breathe.

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